I admit, it’s more difficult than I imagined. The freedom I experienced, the moment when I knew that things were no longer going to be the same… it’s definitely harder when I have time to think, time to ponder, time to doubt, time to confuse my own discernment with that which comes from God. It’ll take so much more than that moment to heal. It will take days, months - however long, I don’t really know. But one thing I heard recently was that, “Time doesn’t heal; time with God heals." This really humbled me. I always thought that time heals, but I realize I’ve been misled (by myself mostly).
Ahh, I don’t know, I know all this sounds so vague. Nonetheless, I really need to take this time to pursue after God. Prayer, as Pastor IJ spoke about today at chapel, is soooo crucial. I hope that I will realize this, not just in my mind, but in my heart, life, and reality.
Other than that, I’m so thankful. SO thankful. That God is answering my prayers every day. In more ways than I thought. Actually, probably in every single way. God is so, so, so good.